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Wednesday, 27 April 2011

Chocolate Chip Cookies and Pizza Faces: A Letter to a Bully

Dear Bully:

I just wanted to take this one moment out of my precious life to share with you, the positive impact you've had on my life and my journey. I'm not here to throw slanderous words at you or cry tears of the pain you once caused me. Where's the fun in that? and it would be so cliche. And I know because of you, your words and your actions, that I am the better person, and don't have the time, commitment or energy, to stoop to such a low level. I have too much self respect and respect for others, which by the way, you taught me, so for that, I am thankful.

Thank you for making me more determined to make something of myself, for wanting to prove to myself that I could be anything I wanted to be, despite your daily harsh words that were shouted at from across the school halls.

Thank you for calling me names, which at the time may have hurt a bit more, but now, make me laugh and appreciate that we are all human beings, and not perfect, but should love ourselves no matter what. 'Chocolate chip face', 'Pizza face'  or 'Brownie', were the highlights that really stood out in mind. Your words about the importance of physical appearance, taught me how shallow some people can be, and how beauty really shines from the inside, and can make a person so stunning. I can walk proudly no matter where I am, and not give a toss about what people think, or what Hollywood thinks. I'm 5'3. I'm not a supermodel. I get zits every now and then. I love eating chocolate chip cookies and cupcakes when I feel like it. I don't have a big booty. I don't have silicone breasts, and guess what?! I don't care! :) So thank you for making me realize that there are better and more important things to focus my attentions on: my family, my friends, my career, and my dreams.

Thank you for teaching me one of life's most valuable lessons: treating people the way you would want to be treated. Because of your constant display of hatred, jealousy, and foul language, it made me so repulsive to the thought or notion of wanting to cause such unnecessary grief on others. I have learned the difference between standing up for myself and what I believe in to putting others down for no apparent reason, other than to make yourself feel better. Because of you, I sought the care and mentorship of my teachers, my parents, or other inspiring people who helped me get through a difficult phase during these years, that you tried to make, what seemed at the time, unbearable. Instead, those years became defining years and helped shape me into the young woman that I am today. I've learned that being a team player gets you a long way in life and work. I've learned to not be a follower, but to be an individual.

And finally, I pray that you may find peace in your heart and soul. I pray that IF or WHEN the day ever comes or has come, where you have realized the wrong you have caused or are still causing to others, that you will learn from your mistakes and not repeat them and then be able to forgive yourself. I hope you will find something meaningful with your life to do so that you can look back on your life and be proud of it instead of looking back on a life filled with regrets.

You have given me two choices. One choice is to let all the pain and tears turn into bitterness, cynicism, and hate - but that would make me just like you. The other choice is to look back on all of this, learn from it, not wallow in self pity, and pick myself up and carry on to bigger and better things. Yep, think I'll go for the second option.

I end this letter with a smile on my face and nothing but peace in my heart, and the hope that others who have gone through what I have been through, will be stronger for the experience and come out of it with a huge smile on their faces too.

The Girl In The Pink Glasses


  1. Karen, this is so beautiful. It means so much to me as I, too, suffered at the hands of bullies. But they made us stronger, not that they meant to. We are the strong ones, and they're too weak to concentrate on their own successes rather than other people's "weaknesses". Loving the twitcams, nice to see such a down to earth, lovely lady. xxx

  2. wow. so inspiring. i love it!

  3. This is beautiful. It is SO touching! I want to come to London and give you a massive hug! But like you said, it has made you a stronger woman. I hate what they must have put for you, but in a way, i'm thankful to them for leading you to be the amazing & successful woman you are now. I would have been your friend if I was in your year! ;) Love you xxxxx

  4. I cant believe you went through this, well look who is being laughed at now, because i am pretty sure those bullys arnt where you are today :(
    You simply amazing and i look up to you,
    love always
    shanice b x

  5. you are so amazing, im now 22 and i still get bullied, you are so strong to thank them i haven't got to that stage yet, i just ignore them, i have more important things to get through like all my stupid illnesses at the minute, Lost of love to you
    Danielle Clark xxxx

  6. performinggeek/Adrienne Massarella27 April 2011 at 20:47

    i always get bullied for being different:-/ and for having olive skin& also i have slight cerabal palsy so i get called 'spaka' alot:( but this makes me feel so much better,thankyou i love you Karen:')


  7. wow that is inspiring, i cant believe someone would say and do such things :( .. i'm glad you've shown these bullies what you've done in life and havn't let them get to you!

    i got bullied and told noone, kinda wish i did now! but luckily it has stopped.

    i love you Karen im glad you've held your head high xx

  8. Karen-your just such an inspiration to everybody. People should continue to admire you and not these image obsessed celebrities.
    Fantastic and thought provoking.
    Keep at it Karen.
    Much Love. xx

  9. Lou (ShoeGalLou)
    Hey Karen i loved that blog, i missed your twitcam as my computer wouldn't work but just read the blog, and it is so inspiring to us all. can't believe you went though that and now can hold your head up and thank the bullies, you are so brave, so lovely and so caring to sll your SuperHeros. I'm so pleased you rised above it all and carried on with what you wanted to do. I love all your blogs, so thanks so much for writing them. Lots of love Lou xxx

  10. Karen, you have a heart of gold. This blog is one of my favourites, as i used to be bullied when i was younger, for my weight, so i starved for ages and ended up in hospital, this truly has inflicted my life. Nothing is impossible, i know, now, i am the better person, and shall NEVER stoop down to there level. Its inspiring to see you can move on, our proof is you. thankyou for keeping our dreams alive, such a down to earth lady, thankyou!xx

  11. (AbbieLouiseT)

    I adore this. As I was bullied at the start of high school, this blog means so much to be. Just reading this has made me feel so much more optimistic about the future and taught me that dwelling on the past is pointless. You inspire me to become a better person and hold my head up high; and for that, I thank you<3

  12. this is so touching, i have experience from it. and this had made me think that im stronger now. karen your a fighter and i admire how you've come from that and turned into the most down to earth,warm hearted woman ever. like you said; treat people the way you want to be treated. i hate what they did to you. but your such a strong person, with a smile that never goes. you have a heart of gold. thank you for being so inspiring; thank you so much
    lots of love xoxo

  13. Wow, Karen you are truly one of the most inspirational people i have ever met. The things you write are so moving, they really touch me. You have acomplished so much in your life and you have so many experiences, i look up to you so much as the things you do really touch my heart.
    You have so many amazing talents, you can act, sing, write and you are such a genuinely lovely person.
    At this moment i am very very very proud to be a superhero. You are such an inspring person.
    Love you!
    Lois :) xxx

  14. This blog is actually amazing! Touched me so much and even made me shed a tear. I got bullied a lot, all the way through school. I still do in college, but it's not as bad anymore. These days, I'm learning to deal with it and ignore it. It's tough but they aren't worth any of my tears.Although I hate the fact that you were bullied, it also makes me stronger, knowing that you got through it and became the person you are today. It inspires me to do the same thing. One day I hope they look back and realise just how wrong and cruel they were.
    Lotsa love,

  15. unbelievably inspiring, i LOVE your blogs, they help build confidence and self esteem :) xxxx

  16. WOW i don't even know what to say, you have an amazing gift when it comes to writing weather it is a song or a blog you make them perfect.

    you always write about things what affect so many people and your helping everyone get through the tough times in life your amazing karen david

    you should be VERY proud of yourself x x x

  17. love all ur blogs are amazing i can releated to this blog because i was affected by bulling from when i was in high school from yrs 8 to 10 and yr 9 was the worst everyday i was bullied your such an amazing person loved ur twitcam on wednesday but i love all ur twitcams

  18. This is so inspiring Karen!! Don't really know how they could call you all them names anyway... I think your absolutely beautiful and an amazing person!!xxxx

  19. OMG! So inspiring? She only goes through all this, so that all you (superhero!?!?!) kids will buy her songs! Shameless self-promotion!

  20. Actually.....may be true!
    But give her chance.